The Commentator

Issue date: 2/12/07 Section: Opinion

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Sadly, the past few months here at Yeshiva have not been pleasant ones for me. Instead, they have been filled with anxiety, depression, and melancholy. I do not suffer from any mental illness and have not experienced any recent academic or romantic crises. Instead, these feelings stem from the high hopes I had about Yeshiva and the reality of my current situation.

Before my arrival at this institution, I lived in Silver Spring, MD. There were approximately 500-600 Orthodox families in the community; however, the small demographic always limited my ability to experience a true Jewish social scene. I was very close with all of my classmates and we would always reminisce about the wonderful and funny stories that took place in our community. The nostalgic moments range from great pranks pulled on teachers to incredible football games in the snow, yet all these fabulous times with my friends only seemed like small events on the radar screen. I was interested in jumping into the abyss I referred to as "the big picture."

Now, many may find my cravings absurd. I had great friends and great stories, and should have been thankful for being granted such a wonderful life. The truth is I am thankful for all that God granted me at that particular point in my life. However, living in a small community, I was subject to many educational deficiencies brought on by lack of monetary support for our Jewish day school. This, of course, hindered religious growth and required me to spend many hours participating in night seders and shiurim offered in nearby cities. I was eventually able to leave my small community and join a strong group of talmidim in Yeshivat Har Etzion. I was even lucky enough to become enriched by the amazing derech halimmud of a tremendous talmid of the Rav and one of the leaders of Torah u-Madda today, haRav Aharon Lichtenstein. After concluding a strong year of learning, I decided to enroll in Yeshiva University.

Elation is the only word I can use to describe my feelings as I rode up with my parents to Yeshiva for orientation. I was very excited to finally join the prestigious and historical institution and at the same time be swept into my first major Jewish social scene. I was already dreaming of befriending a diverse group of students at Yeshiva. I could go into New York with these "friends" and experience the New York life. I could even potentially find a Jewish girl different from the ones that lived in the city I left (not to disparage Silver Spring girls, of course).

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